"Nothing but the Naked Truth"

April 2004

Jump to calendar xmag.com : April 2004 : Erotic City




The biggest news this month is the return of minors to the strip bars! Just don't talk to 'em, touch 'em or roofie them because the OLCC will be right by your side, trying to prove that even when you're old enough to go to war, you're not old enough to dance naked for money.


Penthouse Pet and adult video star Ashton Moore had to cancel appearances last month after she suffered an anal tear in a double penetration scene. The Exotic boys say that's what she gets for appearing in such vids as 100% Anal but never actually taking it in the ass. Karma's a bitch. We wish her a speedy recovery and hope she can make her shows at Stars Beaverton on April 21st and 22nd, Stars Salem on April 23rd and new club SAFARI on the 24th!


Berlin was in town, playing with the Psychedelic Furs and Animotion. Terri Nunn got a whiff of local art star Miss Mona Superhero's duct tape art (www.ducttapeart.com) and called her for a latenight meeting. Mona could not be reached then or now for comment. Her first Seattle show is April 10th at Roq La Rue in Seattle and world domination will likely follow shortly thereafter.


Stripper Stuff!


Nothing like a contest to get strippers throwin' each other down stairs à la Showgirls, and April is full of them, and so is May! Boom Boom Room's Booty Shakin' Contest finals are on Wednesday, April 7th at Boom Boom East. Stars Beaverton hosts their Exotic Covergirl Contest finals on April 15th, so get your taxes done early. Saturday, April 17th is Dream on Saloon's Double Trouble Contest. And in May Jody's will have five (5) days of "World's Best" contests, including Best Pole Worker and Best Butt, May 3rd-7th. Who could ask for anything more?


New Clubs!


Finally some new strip bars open in Portland! Music venue DV8 on SE 50th and Powell has seen the light and decided to go all nude, opening as a strip club on April 15th. And on April 23rd, Safari Showclub opens on 30th and SE Powell. The new owners have completely remodeled what was Doc's in ultra exotic fashion: giant piranha tanks, waterfalls, leopard print everything, and the wildest girls in the west. Safari's Grand Opening bash on the 23rd and 24th is invite-only for industry workers and VIP members. See their ad for details!




Downtown hipster hangout Voodoo Doughnuts hosted their first annual Cockfight last month. Gentlemen contestants were given a pile of porn and five minutes, then measured their [hopefully] erect cocks with specially-made extra-large-hole donuts. Winner Aubrey managed four donuts, won fifty bucks, and celebrated with a box of donuts and some imported beer a stripper bought for him. Congrats!


Killingsworth hipster hangout Exotica held its first annual Blazers Fight later in the month. Our source at the scene said Darius Miles and Quintel Woods had been drinking at the club for several hours when they were approached by fans. The boys weren't very friendly, and the fans mouthed off. Darius Miles immediately threw down and got into it with a man described as "5'7, 140 lbs." Woods was right behind him and suddenly magazine racks were flying. The Blazer Boyz beat a retreat to their Escalade, picking up a twenty-lb. outdoor ashtray on the way. They heaved the ashtray at the little guy, missed and hit the cook's truck, denting it. Shorty got in his car and tried to run down Miles, who jumped on the hood and punched out the driver's side window.

Other presses report that the Blazers were set upon by a group of unruly strip club patrons. Our source, however, disagrees. "Those guys totally instigated it by being assholes. Out of 750 punches thrown, nobody was hit. It was so gay."




4/3 -- Fannypack @ Dante's

4/7 -- Coco Cobra & the Killers @ Ash St. on the Famous Mysterious Actor's Late Night Talk Show featuring special guest Viva Las Vegas

4/14 -- Jet & the Vines @ the Roseland

4/23 -- BLONDIE @ the Roseland

4/27 -- Electric Six w/ Coco Cobra & the Killers @ Dante's

4/28 -- Method Man, Cool Nutz & J.Mack @ the Roseland

May 1 -- Ron Jeremy's Circus Sideshow @ Dante's







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