We're back, just in case you missed us, and, judging from your overwhelming response, my guess is (admit it) you couldn't live without us. You all say, "Yeah, it's just that fuckin' little strip club mag," as you pick up Exotic magazine in your sweating, jonesing little hand and immediately run home to...call up our advertisers. The publisher thinks the issue sucks this month, so, you don't have to bother reading it. Lord knows we (I) try, but...it's just never good enough for some people. I know what: Why don't we run all ads with some misspelled ramblings gleaned off the Internet, throw in a review about some gun or car or some new stripper at a bar we're trying to sell an ad to and call it a fucking magazine. No, we couldn't get away with that... Could we?

So, Teresa Dulce, of Danzine, went all the way to fucking South Africa, with porn icon Sharon Mitchell, to attend a sex workers conference there. But, I know none of you care that South Africa will probably decriminalize prostitution within three years, so, please don't bother reading that piece. And John Chandler reports on two up and coming locals with CDs out, Betty Already and Dear Nora--with real live rocker chicks. But, you don't give two shits about that either. Now, our undercover instigator has penned a wonderful bit of prose exposing the fraud of "Faked Male Orgasms." But none of you want to cop to that, so, better skip that one, too. Rex gives a fond send-off to Viva Las Vegas, now relocated to NYC. But, that's all in the past; let's move on. Darklady gets naked in LA with porn starlets. Who cares, right; it's not you getting it on with porno vixens. Then there's the usual "Pornos For Primates" crappy reviews while the "Superior Sadist" abuses her subs with canned fish products. Boring! DJ Anon waxes about the fate of Napster and Vivid Blue goes to the Mardi Gras (which means Tuesday Fat in French). But why am I even bothering to tell you this. All in all, it's just a bizarre cacophony of voices you will never hear. In fact, you're not even reading this, so, I could call you a fucking moron, and you'd never know. So there. Read on. I talk about your mother later.

Welcome back to all you porn gossip junkies. Let's start off with some covergirl newsflashes for you to wank on. The Big Dog Covergirl Contest concluded last month at Club 205 with 12 of PDXXX's hottest entertainers going at it for the cover of Exotic's 8th Anniversary issue. And the winner was.... MIGHTY ISIS!!! (pictured at left) Isis will be hitting our racks in all her glory this July; until then, enjoy her at Club 205. Congrat's to Isis, with honorable mention to our runners-up--Geni from Sassy's took a very close second, followed by Holly from Sassy's & 205 (Gallery Magazine's Girl Next Door, July 2001) and up-and-comer, Janae, also from Club 205. Sounds like homefield advantage definitely paid off.

Which brings us to this month's covergirl, the innocently dangerous Amaya, from Soobie's Bar & Grill. This little hottie is celebrating her 21st B-day on April 19th. Amaya's birthday also happens to be T-shirt and G-string Giveaway night, so every dollar you put on Amaya's rack can win you the t-shirt straight off her back, or the g-string straight off her...well, you get the picture. Soobie's is still kickin' ass with Tuesday Theme Nights and Pinup Girl Dance Contests. FLASH!!! Catch Amaya live with our favorite radio trashtalk princess, Liz Wilde, on 1080 AM, Friday April 20th; she'll be playing strip trivia along with Ashton, Soobie's strippin' bartender. Exotic will be providing top talent from all you favorite clubs for Strip Trivia--every Friday at 1:00 pm on Liz's show; so, stay tuned.

Jody's and Club Cabos will be taking over Sinferno Cabaret on Sunday, April 22nd. In case you have no idea what this means, we suggest you get your uneducated ass out of the house a little more often and check this shit out!!! We're talkin' fire, debauchery, and hot naked babes; what the fuck else could you hope for on a Sunday night?

Welcome to City Limits Showgirls. This spectacular new club has taken over the old CJ's space in style!!! We rarely get this excited, but once the remodel was close to complete and we saw City Limits, we were very vertically motivated. (Maybe the 27 girls working that Friday night had something to do with it.) PATIO ALERT!!! You can now get hot in the great outdoors at two of our favorite springtime gardens. Visit Doc's Bar & Grill and the Riverside Corral, both opening their patios this month (weather permitting). There's nothing like fresh air and fresher babes-a-poppin'.

Cathie's is getting ready for their new summer lines by having a blow-out sale with 40% off all tube dresses, and an expanded clearance section with ridiculously low prices. So get shopping now for all your dancer and erotic attire needs.

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