"Nothing but the Naked Truth"

April 2003


Jump to calendar xmag.com : April 2003 : Erotic City
Ashcroft Instigates Operation Pipedreams Nationwide

Screw Operation Iraqi Freedom, how about Operation Your Freedom to Patronize Head Shops?? If you've really been living under a rock, you probably haven't heard that OPERATION PIPEDREAMS and the upcoming OPERATION HEADHUNTER 2 has made it all but illegal to own and operate a head shop. Overnight, thousands of glassblowers and smoke shop retailers were out of work, and Tommy Chong of Cheech and Chong was in jail. Apparently the Feds think we're using glass pipes and water bongs to ingest illegal drugs like MARIJUANA, and now you and your friendly neighborhood smoke shop are Public Enemy #1. Our favorite and esteemed U.S. Attorney General John Ashcroft wins this month's the Dude You Are SO Fucked Award. First he spends thousands of our tax dollars to cover the bare-breasted statue of justice behind his news conference podium, and now this. (hats off to J. Mack on this award business).

 

Exotic Wants You...

Demi MondaineHEY LADIES! Exotic Magazine is preparing for the best Boobjob Contest ever. Got a boobjob? Demi Mondaine wants to know all about it. Do you have breast implants? Do you love 'em? Hate em'? The greatest thing ever or the biggest mistake you've ever made? Demi's looking for ladies to share their stories, before and after pictures and their experiences with breast enlargement surgery. We will run selected photos of breasts only and it's totally anonymous. We want to know about the surgeons, the facility where the surgery took place and the kind of procedure you had done: (armpit, through the nipple etc.). Demi and the Exotic staff will pick the best (and worst) looking jobs... again, totally anonymous, no faces, no real names.

Also, send us photos of you and your pets. Everyone knows what animal-lovers strippers and escorts are.... we'll run the photo, your name and where you work. No need to get all dolled up and pose... snapshots are super. Tell us your pets' names, too.

SEND photos to 818 SW 3rd Ave Ste. 1324, Portland, OR, 97204-2405. EMAIL images or contact Demi at xmag@qwest.net.

Last month Exotic inaugurated a new debaucherous monthly extravaganza: to celebrate Bobby Baldwin's birthday, we all slid into a phat red limo and toured a bunch of Portland's finest flesh emporiums, looking for the Top Ten Strippers Exotic Wants to Fuck.

The night was a huge success: Athena at Stars told us she had a sexual dream about one of us, Severina got her toes nibbled, Bobby got spanked at Sassy's while Viva got her ass-kissed by a band boy and the whole crew got onstage at Union Jack's.

We'll pile into the limo again some time in April, checking you out. Results are scheduled to run in next month's Exotic, and will appear haphazardly after that.

Gentlemen's Club News

The Miss Nude Oregon Finals will be held on Wednesday, April 9th at the Dolphin II. Don't miss this event, where the best of the best strut their hot stuff for a $5000 booty. Tickets are available in advance.

Bisexual Britni will be the special guest at this month's VIP Party at Stars Cabaret on April 12th. The boys in the office describe Britni as "naaaaasty!", which always makes for a great show.

On April 19th, Stars plays host to oregonsex.com and ACE's Strip Club Crawl. Log onto oregonsex.com for more information.

J. Mack's fabulous Girlz Night Out is moving to the International Club at San Rafael and MLK Boulevard on April 20th. Exotic is co-hosting this event. Boom Boom East opens this month at the old Club Coco II building on the east end of the Ross Island Bridge. Congratulations to Brandon, one-half of the original Boom Boom owners. on his first solo venture.

It looks as if lower Powell/Foster is gonna start heating up again with the opening of Boom Boom East, the maturing of Devils Point, the ongoing run of Cocktails, the resurgence of Doc's and let's never forget Tommy's...

The Firehouse is hosting a $300 Dance Contest Thursday, April 17th. If you've never been to The Firehouse, it's just north of Salem off I-5, only a 25 minute drive to see some of the hottest dancers in the state. Well worth the extra few minutes to get there.

 


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