"Horny in Honduras"
Honduras isn't exactly the place that
first comes to mind when you start thinking of places
to go trolling for pussy, but that may be changing. Central
and South America are fairly lenient about nudity and
sex so my sex-addict friend went south looking for some
action. Men are always horny and forever on the prowl
it seems. I get such a kick out of hearing my male friends
talk about their sexual exploits and powers.
Paul arrived in Tegucigalpa (the capital,
from here on simply referred to as "Teg") and immediately
set out to find himself a couple of babes. (Paul's got
a lot of energy and can easily take on three or more women
in rapid succession.) He said Teg reminded him of Mexico
because scantily clad women stand outside strip joints
to lure the men in.
One such babe grabbed Paul's arm and yanked
him inside. "You pay 20 lempira," she said and pointed
to the cashier's booth. For the equivalent of about $1.50
Paul got admission, an up front center stage seat, chips,
salsa and a beer. The music started and out came several
young girls who proceeded to bounce around and undress
each other. He said that for a couple of lempira (about
20 cents) the girls came to the edge of the stage and
squatted in front of him. The show topped anything he'd
seen in the states and believe me, he's seen it all! Oh
yes, touching is allowed.
In the big Honduran cities, strip joints
get pretty rank and lewd, but hey, guys like it that way.
Girls will allow customers to fondle them while they dance
or serve drinks--as long as the tips are big, like about
$1. The proprietors are quick to arrange a hook up because
they get a cut of the girl's profit.
If you're horny in Honduras, head straight
to Teg's central plaza area; it's where all the best clubs,
restaurants and hotels are located. The hookers there
are probably not the cleanest, but from what Paul says,
they put out way more effort to please than American hookers
(who, incidentally, don't even rank a 1 on a scale of
1 to 10, says Paul). He had a couple of girls every night
and never paid more than $10 apiece. He wants me to tell
you that for ten dollars Honduran girls will shower with
you, fuck you and suck you off as many times as you can
manage, spending up to six hours with you (all night if
they like you). What he enjoyed most was finding two girls
willing to do each other first and then do him. He said
that was the best twenty bucks he ever spent!
Condoms are only occasionally mentioned
and were never insisted upon, which I think is pretty
scary, but anal is all the rage in Honduras, which I think
is pretty cool.
There are many hotels in Teg's central
plaza area, usually hovering around $30-$40. Few restaurants
exist outside the central area, but Paul used his girls
as guides and saw some magnificent countryside, jungle
and ruins. Dilapidated American school buses are used
as city buses in Honduras; the fare for a five-hour ride
to the Copan ruins was 84 cents! (Paul says he banged
both girls near the altar of the Copan temple!)
One piece of advice the girls shared with
Paul: Don't let the hookers take you to their home or
hotel. You'll get robbed. Always take them to your hotel.
Continental and TACA have connecting flights
to San Pedro Sula or Teg from PDX for around $600. Stays
of less than 30 days require no visa, just passport. Hepatitis
A shots strongly recommended, yellow fever and anti-malarial
drugs a must. Currently, about 14.5 Honduran lempira equals
one U.S. dollar. The off-season, cooler months of December
through April are the best time to go.