Depending on how single you are, everyone’s favorite February holiday is Valentine’s Day, so I will try to lean this month’s offering toward something romance-related. Please don’t take me for the sentimental type. I simply can’t think of any music-related material that jives with President’s Day, nor do I feel qualified to write anything about Black History Month. Genital-mashing it is, then.
While it would be easy to make some nihilistic, snarky piece about failed relationships within bands or a fun, juicy gossip listicle, I thought it would be a better use of my platform to clue you in on some lesser-known pairs that played together and stayed together.
Everyone knows about the failed marriages that couldn’t bring down bands like The White Stripes or Fleetwood Mac and, depending on the time of this publication, Die Antwoord. There are also groups that couldn’t survive the dissolution of the romantic relationship that held it together. R.I.P. Sonic Youth and Cocteau Twins. It was fun while it lasted.
Nay, those wouldn’t be fun to write or read. Why kick a broken thing while it’s down? Some people just aren’t right for each other—no need to rub it in.
Instead, I thought I’d mention some of the more successful but less...boisterous couples that work together musically. If you haven’t heard of them before, it’s probably ’cause they’re doin’ just fine and never had Rumors-level lyrical spats with each other.
Did you know there was a married couple in New Order? I didn’t either, until embarrassingly recently. These two survived low-paid punk upbringings in Manchester and several world tours and are still going strong. What the hell is Peter Hook’s excuse for leaving? It couldn’t be because he doesn’t like the band anymore, considering his solo career consists of playing solely New Order and Joy Division covers. Either way, Gillian and Stephen’s meet-cute seems like it’s ready for the indie film. Gillian used to be in a punk band called The Inadequates, and they rehearsed next to Joy Division. The Inadequates apparently didn’t have a car, so they asked for a ride home in Joy Division’s van in exchange for buying one of their singles, which they hated. Gillian and Stephen began dating shortly after. When Ian Curtis had a solo viewing party of “Woyzeck” that went terribly wrong, Stephen convinced the surviving members of the band to have Gillian round out the new group. Still together, still making music. Now, if only Pete and Barney could make up, I wouldn’t have to pay to see New Order and Hook’s New Order separately.
I feel like most readers are aware of this couple. Though probably not as aware that they were definitely the domestic core of the band that kept it from imploding sooner than it did. Although this is mostly coming from Chris’s recent memoir, it seems that before they got a proper manager, Tina handled a lot of the booking herself. Everything I’ve read seems to imply there wasn’t even so much as a lover’s quarrel in their tenure with the band. Crazy to think, if you’ve ever been on tour—in a fucking punk band, no less. These guys toured Europe with the fucking Ramones. The van had to smell terrible. Kudos to them for making it work. The hard part was dealing with David Byrne’s ego. But hey, it looks like the four of them are now able to be in the same room together. Can we please not have another fucking Rolling Stones tour and instead have a Talking Heads reunion tour?
This one is a bit of a cheat since Kathleen doesn’t perform live with Tom, nor does she play on any of his records. However, it’s simply inaccurate to say they don’t have a musical partnership. Every album from 1992’s “Bone Machine” onward is produced by both Tom and Kathleen. From 1999’s "Mule Variations" onward, they split writing credits. Kathleen was also given some writing credits as far back as 1985’s “Rain Dogs.” They clearly come as a package deal and are still together, living in NorCal with their three kids. This is more proof that Tom’s persona as the wayward, philandering alcoholic is just that—a persona. But it’s also proof that you can be happily married and collaborate with your spouse to create a very authentic oeuvre of said persona…while drinking in moderation.
Everyone’s favorite industrial band when they’re too afraid of being called a poser for saying Nine Inch Nails. Who woulda thought that the creative center of this aggressive, abrasive, loud, brash, and noisy outfit was a happily married couple living in Hamburg with their daughter? Obviously, Lucia isn’t a founding member of Germany’s last significant contribution to pop music (sorry, Rammstein, you’re just the hornier, radio-glossed version of KMFDM). However, the band has included her as a core member longer than it hasn’t (she joined in 2002). Doesn’t really seem like the right environment for a multi-decade monogamous relationship, but just goes to show that it actually is. It’s the radio-friendly, money-making sounds of a band like Fleetwood Mac that is a recipe for fights, infidelity, and divorce. Before you go look it up, no, Lucia is not the female vocalist on “Juke Joint Jezebel.” However, check out “Bait and Switch” off of 2009’s “Blitz” if you wanna hear “Juke Joint Jezebel’s" spiritual successor.
