It’s a well-known fact that the first Alien movie isn’t considered a science fiction film, so much as it is a horror film. But did you know that the entire Alien series is also a romcom? If you search your feelings, you’ll know it to be the truth. Now, I’m talking about the original Alien films, not the ones with Michael Fassbender as everyone’s favorite, lovable android duo, Walter and David. Those films had obvious romantic storylines involved. But the original films might be something you didn’t actively consider as a romcom until you read it in this article. You’re thinking, “absolutely not, where is this coming from? You’re just trying to write something for Valentine’s Day.” Well, part of that is true, but the other part is something I’ll just have to prove to you. And I plan to, in the upcoming list of films you probably never considered as romance films. Starting with the aforementioned…
Alien (OG series)
It wasn’t just the original film that made this a romcom; it has to be the entire original series. The one with the wacky, nine-lives cat, Jones, and Ripley, who is the ruddy, sexy, androgynous human they hate the least out of everyone in space. The first film, Alien, Jones shows us their hard-to-get personality by hiding from everyone on board when they go looking for him. Jones doesn’t really want to be found by anyone, other than Ripley, whom he lets grab them up. He doesn’t even give a fuck that people died trying to find him. Jones ends up sharing a cryotube with the love of their life, Ripley. Honestly, though, I want to say that Ripley also has strong romantic feelings towards Jones, but obviously, Ripley is the perfect example of anti-social, asexual behaviors in an extremely attractive host. Almost a shame. But that’s what makes this duo like water and oil, or an old married couple. Since Ripley takes Jones with her on the next adventure in Aliens, but smartly leaves him behind, like a cattle rancher leaving his wife, while she deals with moon shit. She tells Jonesey she’ll be back, and Jones takes in pets and mentally says something like “yeah right, ok…you better”. The following films did not contain the physical Jones presence, but their presence was there nonetheless in Ripley’s heart, and in ours as well.
Silence of the Lambs
You can’t tell me all the meet-cutes, facial closeness, and mouth noises made on Hannibal Lecter’s side don’t scream “romance.” The tension between Hannibal and Clarice is palpable. Hannibal offers his protection at one point, after Clarice has a run-in with another inmate. That’s the kind of guy you’d go bragging to your dad about, but maybe not bring home for obvious reasons. Clarice and Lecter are intellectual matches in heaven. Lecter loathes the men who objectify Clarice, as he really just wants to pick her brain…probably quite literally. Instead of dining on Clarice (who is treated like the forbidden fruit to him), he chooses to call her on graduation day and ask her not to look for him. Just like any bad boy would. Now…would you just leave something like that out in the wind to never return to? Probably not, I’d say. If the end of the film had done what it was supposed to, Clarice and Lecter would have lived happily ever after together, in another country, dining on fine meats and head cheeses, from exotic and local sources.
Mad Max (Fury Road)
Max and Furiosa obviously get off to a bad start, on a bumpy road, with Max being all gun-crazy and threatening to shoot Furiosa. Furiosa was making her vehicle into the scariest porcupine you could imagine, all to keep out love…don’t be fooled. Furiosa is just as afraid of being betrayed by others as she is of physical dangers, which I think is well depicted in the kind of vehicle she trucks around. But at the end of the day, both Max and Furiosa needed each other to survive at multiple points. Even though Max always claims to be something like…”a lone wolf” or some crap, he goes back to help the lunatic Furiosa, even giving her a blood transfusion at some point! Something I’d absolutely be more terrified of than any sharp object or gun being pointed at me, honestly. But besides all the hygiene not being accounted for, you would say something like…”awwwwww, how sweet. Two disgusting, unbathed survivors who obviously were meant for each other.” How sweet.
Barbie
I wouldn’t say this is totally out of left field, but obviously, Barbie isn’t exactly known for her romantic feelings, and quite frankly, even as a doll, she seemed to always be lukewarm towards Ken. The film shows this beautifully. However, what you might not be thinking about during the film is how Barbie is really just too innocent to understand Ken’s feelings towards her. Ken, on the other hand, has no idea what he is supposed to want out of a relationship, which then draws Ken into a confusing love affair with things of power…like horses? I think Ken, and his obsession with horses, were mainly due to the simplistic nature of not needing to understand where you stand with them, and the fact that you don’t have to be jealous of not having sleepovers with them at their mansions. “Men and horses are just meant to be,” was Ken’s final thought, until Barbie came in and changed how he thought about life (again), and somewhat drew him back into this make-believe “will they, won’t they” situation (it’s always “won’t they”). Oh, unrequited love.
Some honorable mentions which I’ll allow you, the audience, to give your own opinion on: Birdman, Gladiator, Lighthouse, Gone Girl, The Departed, The Lord of the Rings, Oppenheimer, A Quiet Place, The Revenant, and last, but not least, Parasite. The only movie I actually was unable to find a shred of romance in, or a semblance of romantic aspects, was No Country For Old Men…but when I think about it more, it makes it all the more hilarious to consider a good laugh track and some typical Fox network TV show background music put into it. Maybe turning it into some dating show.
Anyway, this was my short list of movies you could consider when trying to come up with a romantic movie to watch on “Valentine's Day,” or whatever. Or just watch another movie and give consideration into how it could be flipped into a romcom. It really opens your eyes to a whole new, yet-to-be-discovered genre of film.
Hannah One Cup can be found trying to decide which of the characters from NCFOM she would date, while arguing that all of the Terminator movies are equally a sort of romance film, especially Dark Fate…that’s a real romcom.
