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The worst thing about being a boot fetishist, as it is with being a fetishist of any kind–shoes, hair, stockings, amputees, boys, whatever–is the sense of isolation. You are prone to think that no one shares your obsession. Despite the fact that there are many magazines dedicated to boots, among them Kinky Boots and Boot Lover’s Digest, and though there are many adult movies about boots on the shelves in the “offbeat” section of the video store, and though many movie stars wear boots with an obvious intent to arouse lustful thoughts, the fact remains that when you are walking down the street and there, crossing the intersection in front of you, is a tall vixen in bright black boots clomping along, you hesitate to stare longingly, you don’t want to be caught by either the girl herself or some “normal” guy walking toward you. You think to yourself, “Does anyone share my obsession?”

Welcome to the Internet.

To state the achingly obvious, it didn’t take long for the sexual outlaws among us to see the potential for the Internet to provide networking among fetishists.

It’s out there. You just have to find it.

I found one. It’s an e-mail chat line with the address

I’ve had more fun reading this group’s e-mail than I’ve had have doing almost anything else in the last few months.

And I thought I was obsessive.

The other members of this service alert each other to cultural personalities who appear in boots, be they UPN network sitcom babes or Leeza on her talk show. They inform each other about new magazines. They let each other in on personal boot sightings in their far-flung cities. They also address certain ethical issues relating to boots. But more about that in a second. Finally, they are all good writers, though sometimes the haste of life compels them to write only the briefest of memos.

I had no idea that Leeza and Kathie Lee Gifford were boot queens. I now know that Leeza is obsessed with boots, and wears them on her show frequently. Apparently she has even appeared on the air in thigh boots. Kathie Lee, the Christian cheap labor exploiter, has been noted in four-inch stiletto heeled boots.

When Pamela Anderson’s new show V.I.P. started, there was a frenzy of anticipation. But at the time of this writing, so far on the show she has been bootless. And when she appeared on Politically Incorrect in a t-shirt, kicking off her shoes to sit barefoot on the chair, there was a general sense of disappointment, if not downright betrayal. After all, this is the girl who wore killer thighboots in Barb Wire.

Oh, and by the way, do you think that boys watch professional wrestling because of the muscles and the warfare? Nope. It’s for the boots that appear on Sable, and on Elizabeth.

These people are delightful obsessives, like me, but they are also respectful. They debate the efficacy of alerting boot queens in the media about how much appreciated it is that they don boots. These women shouldn’t be scared off of boot wear–and there are actual examples of this happening.

Gillian Kendall, have no fear.

Jimmy Doyle is a former New York cop now living in Portland.

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