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 White
Lightning; VCA; Dir., Veronica Hart; Stars: Ginger Lynn,
Chloe, Kylie Ireland, Nina Hartley, Anita Cannibal, Michael
J. Cox, Billy Glide
Video
Clip
Ginger
Lynn has good girl sex with her cop husband before he goes
to work. Once again, he leaves her high and dry—lounging
on white linen in the morning sun. On top of that, he’s
meeting bad girl, Chloe, for afterwork handjobs under linen
at a strip club. No one notices  Chloe
mount his naughty nightstick; talk about table dances. Like
a down and dirty Dallas, White Lightning introduces
the sleazy characters one by one. VCA likes these adult
soap features, like the Ginger Lynn comeback, Torn.
Except this time, the direction is not camp or satire but
serious.
Chloe
turns drool boyfriend, Micky G., into an anal-linguist.
Chloe screams, “Make me come, you fuck!” as Micky
gets to fuck her with his little cock. Chloe wipes his splooge
off her ass with a towel, dons her leather dress and tells
him she fakes it seven out of ten times before she walks
out the door. She’s upset because he won’t kill
for her. So, poor, pathetic, pussy-whipped Micky must go
out and kill for more of her pussy.
Back
at the strip club, Chloe’s blowing the detective while
her boyfriend watches—getting up the motivation to
kill for her. For a guy with a little dick, Micky G. gets
around as he breaks into his ex-girlfriend’s house
so he can have sex with her—but only for revenges'
sake.
Like
samurai storytelling, Lightning is told from the
perspective of all major characters. Ambitious, for porn.
Although it’s a major VCA release, Lightning
flashes like an indie adult feature. A for effort. Couples
will be pleased. Watch out for Ginger Lynn masturbating
for her therapuss, Nina Hartley, near the end. Super porn
icon lightning.
Voyeur 16;
John Leslie Productions; Dir., John Leslie; Stars: Linda
Thoren, Deborah Valentine, Mark Davis, Jake Steed
The
premise for this long-running series is a pervy guy loping
around back alleys and barrooms catching whores having sex
with horny hung guys. The jerky camera, oddball angles and
spontaneous action doesn’t convince me that the camera
is catching cunt unawares. Thoren throats Mark Davis, giving
it up so she can get a job acting, or something. Another
Leviathan cock steps in to give her more meaty lines to
work with, building to the inevitable climax. This drama
queen’s too easy.
Cut
to the car lot, where a couple opens the hood of a showroom
model as an aphrodisiac. Crash, this is not. The
cars and custom wheels are window dressing on another straight,
wordless fuck scene. Although i wouldn’t mind shopping
for a car—or anything else—that way. Stick to
John Leslie’s Fresh Meat series. Voyeur’s
getting stale.
Fresh Meat
8; John Leslie Productions; Dir., John Leslie; Stars: Jazmine,
Kitty, Chaterina
Nasty
Eurotrash whores in PVC walk around a factory where workers
mindlessly beat-off to the din of machinery. The whores
kneel and suck while the workers read their mags on break.
Pistons pummel remaining holes. Euro grunting. Cut to the
sunny chateau. Girl in sunglasses fantasizes about all things
anal. DP: We’re on the move. Imaginary guys manage
to come on her face without getting a drop on her shades.
A blonde gets ready on the bidet while a redhead kneels
on the bathroom floor and takes it. Lots of nice furniture
to fuck on. Feel like I need my shades, squinting at the
bare-sunlight-streaming-in-through-the-windows-sex. I much
preferred Fresh Meat 7: dark, moody surreal. Come
to think of it, Fresh Meat 8 looks suspiciously like
a tired voyeur. Or, maybe that’s just me.
 Private
Video Deluxe; The Club; Dir., Frank Thring; Stars: Meridian,
Martina Mercedes, Frank Gun
Feeling
like the only way is down (under), I pick up the Aussie
Private vid release and stick it in to me. Videodrome. Anyhow,
I thought The Club was a device to deter car thieves. Apparently,
it’s also the latest Frank Thring thing shot in pervy
Prague. Hold the Czech, please. Techno’s just catching
on in the former Eastern Block as a guy gets butt fucked
by his strap-on mistress. Ride, Sally ride. All the weird
slo-mo edits are supposed to imitate Ecstasy—the drug,
that is. But that double entendre’s not working for
me, anymore than the double espresso I gulped two hours
ago to make it through this java jungle. Director Thring
must be going through his Andrew Blake phase. Nice cascade
of blowjob facials, though, as The Club heats up
long enough to make me stop writing . . .
After
an hour of this slo-mo interruptus photography, I’m
longing for the days of Nikita (Kruschev, that is) and Mafia
controlled B&W porn. Donkeys, dildoes and death, baby.
Mr. Thring should pay more attention to his actors and story,
and less attention to his new digital editing bay. Okay?
Thank God for the torn black pantyhose and SS style hats
near the end; otherwise I couldn't have come . . . this
far. In the end, The Club is like a bad front end
alignment. Steal it if you must take it out for a joy ride.
 Pure
Sin; Sin city; Dir., Nic Cramer; Stars: Linda Thoren, Bridgette
Kerkove
Video
Clip
Linda
Thoren, the new platinum slut on the block, masturbates
a lot while watching pure sin vignettes—fed to her
over the internet by some Machiavellian web king. Her trashy
innocence is believable as she gets schooled in raunch by
logging on. The internet is making good girls go bad. The
only thing I don’t like about this set-up is: Thoren
hasn’t sucked a single dick yet and I’m forty-five
minutes into this thing. Finally, at 54 minutes into Sin,
Thoren, wearing a red blindfold, sucks dick. Well, it’s
about time. Her internet guide, who opened her eyes to see
sin, now opens her cunt to his cock. Thoren’s now ready
to graduate to being his little whore. Her sick mentor pimps
her out to cigar smoking dot-com dickheads. Thoren, who’s
been mute in the previous films I’ve seen her in, actually
speaks in a dumb blonde euro accent. It almost jerks for
me.
I
imagine how this story of her character’s corruption
mirrors her real life journey from some cheap Czech skin
ghetto to $1000 a day meat puppet. Good for her. Thank God
we fought the Cold War so girls can come here and fuck on
film. Give me your tired whores, your yearning asses burning
to fuck me. Fuck it; let’s plays some cards.
Thanks to
All Night Rachel and her new bio-chemical regime.
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