Exotic Magazine Online Uncovering adult entertainment online since 1993
Home
News
Events
Directory
Archives
Info
xmag.com : December 2003 : Carnal Knowledge
Carnal Knowledge
As I press on the gas pedal and weave the Silver Spider through the Los Angeles streets, with the carbon-monoxide-flavored wind blowing through my not-nearly-so-much-like-a-mullet-as-it-used-to-be hair, I feel an emergent sense of freedom, a new way of feeling, of seeing, and of experiencing the world.
 
Sure, I'm here to see tits, to feel tits, and to silently compare one set of tits against another, yet there are more things to life than tits, even though it is tits that butter my bread and it's undeniable that a tit-man I'll always be.
 
But I am here because LA has become my sanctuary, my refuge, a glistening neon vagina that offers a warm, rain-free coziness away from all the little screaming brats who need me in Portland.
 
I'm Portland's babysitter. That's been my job for years.
 
I am a kind man, a wise man, a generous man (and a tit-man), yet the only discernible reward for these virtues is the task of keeping some of P-Town's most incurable fuckups out of trouble. I have to keep Goad from beating women, I gotta tell Viva to stop blowing guys in public, and I'm always buying penicillin for everybody who works at Dante's. The minute I go anywhere, it's always, "Frank! Frank! Me! Me! Do something for me, Frank! Help me, Frank!" And what happens when I help them? They ask for twice as much help and then wind up stealing supplies from me.
 
I'm not even going to talk about Darklady and Gary Aker. I mean, I swore I wouldn't. But the first thing I'm going to do when I get back home is give Goad a 200% raise.
 
So don't hate me if I drive through LA, sippin' on gin and juice, with my mind on tits and tits on my mind. I earned this vacation.
 
It is the city of Portland, not I, that suffers when I'm gone.
 
 
PS: Our friends the Monks--Rob and Jane--offer everyone a hearty "aloha" from this sun-splashed land of palm trees and coconuts.

 

 

 

X

More Carnal
Knowledge
...

2003
Jul.03

Apr.03

Mar.03

Feb.03

Jan.03

2001

Dec.02
Nov.02
Oct.02
Sept.02
Aug.02

Aug.02

Jun.02

May.02

Apr.02

Mar.02

Feb.02

Jan.02


2001
Dec.01
Nov.01

Oct.01

Aug.01

Jul.01

Jun.01

May.01

Apr.01

Mar.01

Feb.01

Jan.01


2000

Dec.00

Nov.00

Oct.00

Sep.00
Jun.00
May.00
Apr.00
Mar.00

Feb.00
Jan.00

1999

Dec. 99

Nov. 99
Oct. 99

 

2003 X Publishing, Inc. All rights reserved. copyright | trademark | legal notices
Join Adult Friend Finder - largest Adult Personals with over 10 million registered members!